Use a mower, go to jail...
The place next door to us is an old single level turn of the century home with four semi-connected units. The unit directly next to our house is occupied by two nice young ladies. My husband mows their lawn when he mows ours, since they have no mower and the lawn is connected to ours. He mowed it for the previous tenants, too, a young newlywed couple. We are neighborly. Next to them is Weird Larry. We stay away from Weird Larry because he is, well, weird. A strange round man, probably in his 60s, who spends most of his time tucked into his tiny apartment, shopping at Food4Less, and occasionally repairing mobile homes for a living. He also claims to be a writer.
The other day we had a message on the answering machine from the police. They had a complaint from "the property owner" (he wishes) next door, saying we had illegally mowed his lawn and we are ordered to stay off his property. Uh, hmmm, maybe, we thought, hubby didn't know exactly where to stop when he mowed the girls' lawn. So I walked over to talk to Weird Larry about it. I was all nice, inquired if there was a problem, and asked if maybe for future problems we could talk about it instead of involving the police. Weird Larry was a jerk.
I explained that hubby hadn't done anything wrong intentionally, but if he had mowed too far, wouldn't it have been easy to just step outside and say, "Oh, ya know, you can stop right here, I'll take care of my own part?" WL said he wasn't home at the time, he was in a nearby town. I asked why he thought hubby did it, then. He started insisting "I know he did it and he did it because he's an asshole." Then he claimed he had photos of hubby doing it. Umm, yeah, right. The photos he took from the little town 13 miles away?
He also insinuated that the only reason my hubby mows the lawn for the girls is because they are young females. Whatever. On my way home I noticed that Weird Larry's whole lawn was indeed mowed, not just a little encroachment over the line between the two neighbors. I confirmed with my hubby that he hadn't done it.
So I asked J, WL's neighbor on the other side, if he was the nice neighborly guy who had mowed WL's lawn. Indeed he was. He was doing his own, so to be nice he did WL's, too. Unfortunately, WL considers such neighborly acts vandalism worthy of police intervention.
Yesterday I saw WL on the sidewalk. I told him it was J who mowed his lawn. He yelled at me some more. I'd finally had enough. I said, "Well, Larry, I hope you feel as foolish as you are." Love thy neighbor be damned. Asshole.
The other day we had a message on the answering machine from the police. They had a complaint from "the property owner" (he wishes) next door, saying we had illegally mowed his lawn and we are ordered to stay off his property. Uh, hmmm, maybe, we thought, hubby didn't know exactly where to stop when he mowed the girls' lawn. So I walked over to talk to Weird Larry about it. I was all nice, inquired if there was a problem, and asked if maybe for future problems we could talk about it instead of involving the police. Weird Larry was a jerk.
I explained that hubby hadn't done anything wrong intentionally, but if he had mowed too far, wouldn't it have been easy to just step outside and say, "Oh, ya know, you can stop right here, I'll take care of my own part?" WL said he wasn't home at the time, he was in a nearby town. I asked why he thought hubby did it, then. He started insisting "I know he did it and he did it because he's an asshole." Then he claimed he had photos of hubby doing it. Umm, yeah, right. The photos he took from the little town 13 miles away?
He also insinuated that the only reason my hubby mows the lawn for the girls is because they are young females. Whatever. On my way home I noticed that Weird Larry's whole lawn was indeed mowed, not just a little encroachment over the line between the two neighbors. I confirmed with my hubby that he hadn't done it.
So I asked J, WL's neighbor on the other side, if he was the nice neighborly guy who had mowed WL's lawn. Indeed he was. He was doing his own, so to be nice he did WL's, too. Unfortunately, WL considers such neighborly acts vandalism worthy of police intervention.
Yesterday I saw WL on the sidewalk. I told him it was J who mowed his lawn. He yelled at me some more. I'd finally had enough. I said, "Well, Larry, I hope you feel as foolish as you are." Love thy neighbor be damned. Asshole.
posted by Somebody's Mom at 11:04 AM
4 Comments:
Woah, Weird Larry, what a guy. I'll say, if we came home and noticed that our neighbor had mowed our lawn we'd be like, hey, alllllright! Though Hubs might have to point out that they 'missed a spot' ;)
No doubt! Too bad he didn't retaliate by mowing OUR lawn. That woulda shown us!
We live on 6 acres, and there is about an acre between us and our neighbor. My FIL was mowing on our riding lawnmower one morning (like, 11 am) and neighbor came and yelled at him because his wife works nights and can't sleep with him mowing. We knew this when we moved here 5 years ago, talked to neighbor about it, he said we could mow whenever we want. After aforementioned yelling he said not to mow tuesday mornings near their fence. The next week, on tuesday morning, he was riding his dirt bike around their property. WHATEVER.
People are freaks.
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