Hangover Helper?

No, I haven't been drinking. I'm recovering from Consumer Sunday. I shopped. I got a new bed for our son, a coffee-maker, two lamps, and some miscellaneous crap. I thought I was gonna keel over from the sensory overload of it all. Lights and noise and idiots and ads. Everywhere. Are there really people who shop all the freaking time? How do they do it? No, no, no, WHY do they do it? Do they really need more CRAP?

Just getting it home (thanks, Dad!), assembling it all (thanks, Pootie-Pie!), recycling all the boxes, disposing of all the resulting trash... dang, it's a lot of work! Especially when it's on top of a day of dealing with stupid selfish shitheads in a stupid goldurn mall who 1) can't drive and 2) are buying so much ridiculous unnecessary poorly made consumer victim crap it makes me cringe and wonder if evolution has shifted into Reverse. And, speaking of reverse, if you're gonna haul all your new crap home in a giant, polluting, death-on-wheels, road-blocking machine of doom and destruction, LEARN TO F'ING DRIVE.

Thank you.

And, umm, perhaps next time I won't test drive the new coffee maker quite so much before posting.